In the mission I decided to organize, we were going to try and convince everyone that someone - who was not at all famous, was famous. We did this by surrounding him with bodyguards, screaming fans and Paparazzi, and giving him a driver.
I wanted this to happen when the crowds were huge on the mall, so there was no better time than the Cherry Blossom Festival - when the Kite Festival was going on - Just after the Capitol Marathon on the Mall.
The goal of the mission was to turn heads and convince people that Peter - our "star" - was actually famous with the ultimate goal being to get him to the top of the Washington Monument without a ticket.
I surveyed the area and this was the crowd we were going to have to contend with. You can see how insane the crowd is around the monument.
I went from thinking "we can probably make it up" to "we probably won't make it up," but only time would tell.
I met up with a few people at the lake, however I think the map of where to meet didn't circulate as much as I had hoped because 20 minutes after the Entourage was supposed to meet we were still short a bodyguard, our star and our video camera - I was uneasy but hopeful. After getting in touch with Peter and being assured he was on his way, Allison showed up with the video camera which was a huge relief! We waited to make sure nobody else was coming and I began going over the mission and we began taping.
There were about 40 people that met and I was expecting around 100 by the facebook group size. I had to change how quickly people would meet up with the star, but that was just a small change.
Walking up we actually witnessed an accident between a bus and a car. The bus sideswiped the car and made off with its rear-view mirror. Photographic goodness here:
We all got into positions acting either relaxed and oblivious to what is coming (fans) or nervous and wanting more info from our tipsters so we can get the best shots (paparazzi).
These are some of our agents waiting for the star to arrive:
We were poised and ready to turn hundreds if not thousands of heads.
The driver gave me a call as he turned onto Madison Ave. and I bolted for the car and started to take pictures while it was still moving. They pulled up and the star emerged.
Even though there were only three paparazzi members and no crazed fans around the star in the very beginning we were already starting to turn heads just from the bodyguards and driver dropoff.
We had made up a title of a fake song Peter was famous for - "Trapped in my Heart" - and it was about this time that one of the male fans yelled at the top of his lungs "Trapped in my Heart changed my life!!!!" I got quite a kick out of that, but it wasn't too long after that Peter ad-libbed the chorus for "Trapped in my Heart" to ridiculous amounts of fanfare by the quickly multiplying crazed fans.
Peter gave me a call ready to throw in the towel, but I told him to try and go back up one more time and reason with the guard again.
Me: Peter, you're not setting a very good role model for your younger fans here.
Peter: Actually, I don't think that's true. I waited until I was of legal age, and now that I am, what's legal is legal
Me: Yes, but what can kill you can kill you.
Peter: I'm pretty sure I have a smaller chance of being killed by cigarettes than blindly walking through traffic (as I'm walking backwards through the street to take pictures of him)
*pause*
Me: *sarcastically* I hate you Peter.
Quite a funny moment on the trip - and Touche Peter... Touche.
I did run after the car though and "snapped" pictures through the back window as long as I could keep up with the car. I ended up stopping right in front of the natural history museum where curious onlookers struck up a conversation:
Them: Who was that?
Me: Peter Cardinale.
Them: Who's he?
Me: Oh, he's a singer... he has an album coming out soon. I think this was partially for publicity, but hey, it puts food on my table.
Both of us chuckle and I walk away having convinced them.
The crew split up pretty fast and some of us met up in Chinatown for food and drinks, but most of us were so worn out from the day that we were ready to pass out.
It was tons of fun and I greatly appreciate everyone who made it out and made the event such a success. I look forward to the next one!
Me: Peter Cardinale.
Them: Who's he?
Me: Oh, he's a singer... he has an album coming out soon. I think this was partially for publicity, but hey, it puts food on my table.
Both of us chuckle and I walk away having convinced them.
The crew split up pretty fast and some of us met up in Chinatown for food and drinks, but most of us were so worn out from the day that we were ready to pass out.
It was tons of fun and I greatly appreciate everyone who made it out and made the event such a success. I look forward to the next one!
19 comments:
That sounds like so much fun. I was planning on going, but unfortunetly I couldn't make it. I look forward to the next one. Can't wait.
This is not funny. You ruined my day trying to find out who this person was.
Wow, how can that possibly "ruin your day" you need to get a sense of humor...
Well done everyone!
I took several pictures of this "celebrity" and sent them out to all my friends with the subject line "Russell Crowe". Thanks for making a fool out of me. I would like an apology for this hoax. You are no Orson Welles.
Hey I blogged about this on the City Paper blog, http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/citydesk/2008/04/04/you-may-have-millions-of-adoring-fans-but-you-still-aint-shit/
Great job! I hope to make the next one !
Tanya - I saw that and much appreciate it. I wish it would have gotten more coverage.
anonymous #4...
Wow, if you were really there taking pictures... wouldn't the massive crowd yelling "Peter!!!" tell you it wasn't Russel Crowe?! I suspect this is a complete lie, but if it isn't perhaps you being made a fool of was deserved.
Good to finally see some of the pictures (haven't had a chance to look for them until now.)
That was a great time, man. Can't wait to do one again.
Hey Orson,
Tell me these pictures don't look like Russell Crowe.
http://img146.imageshack.us/my.php?image=img0413td9.jpg
http://img512.imageshack.us/my.php?image=actor5xk9.jpg
I took over 15 pictures of this so called "celebrity" which left no more room on my memory card to take pictures of my two children on their first trip to DC. We live out in Warrenton and we don't get to DC often. Thanks for messing up their trip with this hoax.
And if Peter had actually been Mr. Crowe, that WOULD have been worth not being able to take pictures of your children?
P.S. Bruce, you called me "Ryan" in the caption to one of the pictures. Any chance of fixing that before I link all my family and friends to this blog post. Many of them are easily confused. :P
Wow! It just shows you the stupidity of the masses. monkey see monkey do! You'll waste shots shooting someone you think is Russell Crowe and then blame the people who dooped you?! It's your sorry butt that can't tell what russell crowe looks like, or hear crowds yelling peter. Besides a far away pic of a 'star' over memories of your children in DC, what the heck does that prove? That you're a self-indulgent irresponsible, blame-all-my-problems-on-somebody-else-instead-of-taking-responsibility-for-my-own-actions idiot!
Amazing fun. I knew that it was scheduled to happen but didn't know when. It was random luck that I happened to be on the monument when you showed up.
The best part was the group of nearby middle school kids who excitedly told someone "We're from a small town! We don't ever see ANYONE!" You made their day.
Many appologies Evan! The bodyguard that wasn't able to make it was named Ryan - sorry for the mix up!
Anonymous #5: While I am sorry that your photo-taking ability was adversely affected, If the ability to take 15 pictures was the make or break point of the entire trip as you suggest - perhaps more preparedness is in order. Additionally I guarantee there are kiosks with disposable cameras entirely surrounding the mall for just a few dollars so if you come to such a pivotal point in the future you'll know where to go.
Hi, It's anonymous #5. I don't appreciate the rancor here. Okay I get it. It was a joke. I'll move on.
You are lucky I didn't send my pictures to Homeland security. To me it looks like two tall Middle Eastern men along with two anti-war liberal protesters were trying to breach the security of the Washington Monument. My children told me they heard the celebrity say "Damn America".
But I believe in peace.
My slight Middle Eastern features are a result of my Jewish heritage. It is probably a good thing that you are such a hands-off parent who places more importance on looking celebrities than on watching your own children, or else you would be teaching anti-Semitism to your children AS WELL AS plain old xenophobia.
And, while Peter said nothing of the sort, you should realize that saying "damn America" is perfectly legal, thanks to the wonderful constitution of this country. Again, it's great that your children won't have your facist views handed down to them, since you seem so hands off with them.
Seriously, for he sake of your children, and the messages you teach them, grow up!
P.S. It is also not illegal to be Middle Eastern. Just letting you know before you do something silly like calling the cops on a neighbor.
http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb101/rootbear75/petervscrowe.jpg
there is a slight resembleance, but you cant mistake him for Russell Crowe (only at a distance.. MAYBE)
you got close enough for a good look, so therefore, there was NO excuse for being stupid
Oh my God, the only thing better than the gag itself is the people who claim it ruined their trip!!
That's priceless :-)
i think Peter has left more comments on this blog than anyone else...the nasty ragging ones - that remind you of a constipated old man...who thinks everyone wants to smell his sh...t!
How is jail looking these dayz...Pete
Post a Comment